I walked on the treadmill today - and I loved it!

These words are so foreign to me. I can't recall a time in my life that I've enjoyed exercise. I mean - exercise for the purpose of exercise. I can enjoy a walk with a friend or the kids, or a swim. But - I've never ever been able to say that I loved walking on the treadmill.

But, today was different. I decided earlier today - that this was it. I am not this fat person. I'm carrying all of this extra weight - and the me I know is hidden inside somewhere. And, it wasn't a defeated decision either. It was a determined, while desperate decision that I've got to start changing my life - and that means making time for myself to walk on the treadmill after work.

So - I walked in the door - assigned the baby to Paige to watch and got started. I had my Ipod and I really enjoyed myself. I was dancing while walking - and singing.

At one point - the kids came in to watch me because the baby was crying and wanted me. So - they laughed and said I was silly when I was dancing - and singing badly - but I had fun.

25 minutes later I'd walked a mile and felt so good. I could have kept going - but mommy duties were calling.

I feel great! I'm proud of myself - and amazed by this change in attitude.

We dyed Easter eggs yesterday. Alaina did it for a little while - then got mad when I told her that she couldn't drink the dye water. So she started crying - I held her - and then she ended up on the couch watching tv. At least I got some pics of her before she gave up on it.

Here they are!



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So, it has been a wikedly long time since I posted. I've been nagged about it by more than one friend - so here I am with nothing of substance to say.

So - work is nutty. I love love love my job. But times like these demonstrate the stupidity that can be shown working for the government. Not that my experience with Corporate America was any better.

My kids are on spring break this week, so spending lots and lots of time doing nothing. But, I've been very proud of Paige. She came downstairs last night with three bags of trash and a basket of dirty clothes. She has been cleaning in her room on her own - with no encouragement from me. I'm glad that she has found the motivation to do it.

Alaina has been adorable lately. She is talking so much and comes up with the cutest things to say. Last Friday, my Dad picked her up from daycare so I could work late. When they were driving home, Alaina chirps up from the back seat... "Grandpa! Grandma has a duck on a stick!" He was utterly confused. "A duck on a stick?" Alaina - "Yeah - a duck on a stick." Well - my mom has an umbrella that has a duck handle. LOL - that was her duck on a stick.

I had a mini-pregnancy scare this week. My period was late by about a week. I started freaking out. I'd love to have another baby - but I don't think we'll ever have another. So, part of me really wanted it - other parts of me was so worried about it. I freaked out for nothing. Walked in the rain to the drugstore to buy a test - and then it was negative. Then my period started within a matter of hours. Duh! I could have done without this experience this week. I became in touch with too many feelings that I didn't need.

Okay.... enough random ramblings from me today.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming.

I have a new nephew. Jackson Parker Finley was born at 11:44pm last night. He weighs 7lbs even, and is 19 inches long.

My sister only had three more contractions after getting off the phone with me.. then he was born!!

Neither of us had any idea that she was that close to delivering when I talked to her.

All is well with mom and baby. Now, I'm waiting to see pictures.

My sister is in labor with her son. She lives far away so I don't get a chance to be there with her. That makes me a bit sad.

But, I got a chance to talk her through a contraction! I called to check on her to see how she was and she started having a contraction while she was on the phone. It was cool for me to be able to coach her and talk her through it. She is doing so amazing.

I'll post tomorrow about my new nephew!

I had lunch today with friends at a Chinese restaurant. I laughed when I saw my fortune. I was going to post it here - but alas - it fell out of my pocket and I've lost it.

Anyways...... the fortune said something like my creative skills would soon be known.

I thought it was rather ironic - that just yesterday I decided I wanted to pick up crocheting again. I went to the store and bought new crochet hooks and some yarn. I always enjoyed crocheting, but always got bored with projects, like blankets and could never finish them.

So, I've recently found an interest in the cute little crochet toys for kids, balls, stuffed animals, etc. They are small enough that I shouldn't get bored with them - so that is my new goal.

I started last night - and refreshed my self with the basics - and I'm working on reading a pattern.

We'll see.....

I experienced something incredibly amazing tonight.

I attended the Democratic caucus in Kansas - to show my support for Barack Obama. I didn't know what to expect, as I've never participated in a caucus before.

My location was at my daughter's middle school. An inner-city school in the center of a struggling neighborhood. And, it was hear that I witnessed history in the making.

I knew I was in for an interesting night when I arrived 30 minutes early and had to park a block and a half away from the school. It took me almost 30 minutes to get through the doors to register. I was immediately greeted by fellow Obama supporters - with a sticker, which I'm still wearing proudly.

The lunchroom, was quickly becoming more and more crowded. Half of the room was intended for Hillary supporters - the other half for Obama supporters. Well - the Obama crowd quickly spread across their half - and poured over into the media area - and the area intended for those that were undetermined.

While we waited to begin I joined the group in Obama chants such as "Yes We Can" and "Fired up. Ready to go" and "Obama Obama Obama" There was even a man playing the banjo and leading us in cheers. The Obama committee walked through the crowd, distributing bottled water, cookies, and soda. I enjoyed conversation with the crowd around me and was soon joined by both my mother and father.

We were packed in like sardines - standing room only - and no room to move. It was hot and uncomfortable. But, so amazing. At one point I started to tear up. I just felt so moved by this huge group of people that were willing to come out in a snow storm to represent the change that we are all fighting for, for our country.

Our Governor, Kathleen Sebelius has publicly endorsed Obama, and she spoke tonight for Obama. She was so motivating.

So, crammed in this little lunchroom, probably with a max capacity size of no more than 200 people - we had 901 individuals come out to show their support for their candidate.

After the final caucus count - Obama was a victor! With, 635 votes, compared to Clinton's 213.

Obama won 10 delegates tonight!

I feel so proud to have been able to participate in this event. And, I thank my friend Kim for getting me involved and telling me I should go. I'm glad I went - and I'm proud to have done my part to help foster the change that our country so desperately needs.

This is a song by Ingrid Michaelson that I adore! When I listen to the words, it reminds me of how I feel when I wake up with a sleeping babe.

Here is a link to here the song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmlDWR1QGuk

Here are the lyrics.

yesterday
i woke up
with your head on my arm
my hand was numb
circulation gone
but i dared not move
the pretty sleeping one

the sun had painted
patterns on your face
as you breathe sunday air

rode on to my open arms
i became your pillow
you let me smooth your hair

i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way

i know you have to close your eyes
on everyone, let me help you,
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies

let me lie in the curve
of your body tonight
and i will hear you
tumble into sleep
i will watch you heal
i will watch you heal with me

i will sing you morning lullabies
you are beautiful, and peaceful this way
i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you, ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabies

i know you have to close your eyes on everyone
let me help you
ill sing you to sleep
with morning lullabye..bye baby

close your eyes
and i will sing you
morning lullabies

Score: 33
I have some hippie in me.
Cool, man.

Take the elitemrp.net "Are you a Hippie?" Test
http://elitemrp.net/hippytest.shtml

At age 32, I'm realizing that I've never really defined my own personal style. As far as clothing and what not.

In college I was grunge as hell. (thanking Bons for the term)

After I dropped out of college, I returned to my urban home and basically lived in jeans and tees.

I got married at age 20, and then joined the professional business world. Being young and poor, I couldn't afford nice work clothes - so I lived in the hand-me-downs of my mother and aunt. Meaning - I looked like an old woman. Well - not old. But older than my 20 yrs.

This continued through my twenties. And, with the weight gain added in to the picture - I refused to invest much in clothes because I didn't want to admit that I was big and was going to stay big for awhile. So, I bought most of my clothes on clearance at Kohls or at walmart, or Fashion Bug.

So, I'm going through some serious personal growth in my life right now. And part of that is thinking about my personal style. I miss the days of baggy jeans and flannel. I'm drawn to crystals and pretties. I miss my grunge days. But, I also have to fit into the professional world. And, you just don't see much of that here. ;)

I think I shall seek some guidance from some of my buddies.